Oh, I have something really bad to tell him. Hopefully he'll read it here and then I won't have to break the news myself.
My mother is coming.When, you virtual-pals in blogland want to know? Well, Wednesday night for just one night. Then she'll be looking around Rhode Island to find her new home. Uh oh. Kinda close. I see a move in our future.
He's going to be a little peeved because when she asked if she could stay here I said no but ended up saying okay for just one night. He's really going to want to murder my not because he can't get along with her, but because she's very slyly horrifyingly bad to me. It drives him crazy. Little does he know I fibbed and told her I have class that night so I'll be gone from 5 til 10:30!!!!
The thumbnail sketch and then I really have to study. She was a terrible mother. Her husbands always came miles ahead of me and my brother. Neglect is a nice term. She made him feel invisible. She ruined New England for her latest husband and he has recently left screaming for Florida so seeing him will be difficult from now on. She is a history revisionist so she'll go on and on about what a great mother I'll be when in reality she told me I would be a horrible mother for soooo many years that I actually needed therapy to exorcise some of her programming. She was certain I'd kill my dog. My dogs are so much better cared for than hers. She's a narcissist, too. If I wasn't so high profile in our town, she probably would have ignored me, too. Nothing can be mine alone. Hard to explain but let me try.....
crazy, aisle one...
I had a breast reduction about 8 or 9 years ago. I now have the world's most perfect boobies (you can ask my husband when he's talking to me again after next Wednesday.....). I was in the tub at my house when my friend Suzi came over to see how I was doing. It was my first bath at home and my mother had come over to 'help' but was banished to laundry. So, Suzi and I were talking and mom came in. Suzi had a look at the scars and things and out of the blue my mother says, "This is what they looked like BEFORE surgery!" and whips her shirt open and flops out her breasts that look nothing like mine. Then about 6 months later she got the same surgery. She would show people in the grocery store! I kept hearing all these horrible stories that other people thought were funny but made me feel so sad and embarrassed.
And the kicker? She recently offered to take my infant child for a week at a time so I could go back to work. She can't seem to hear that I'm NOT going back to work, but that's another story.....
mommie dearest: I can pick up the baby on Monday and then bring the baby back on Friday so you can work.
me: Ah, again, I'm going to be staying home with the babe. I have no plans to send my child away midweek and I'm going to breast feed so that's not even an option.
md: You can't breast feed. (verrrry snotty tone of voice.)
me: Why on earth not?
md: Because of your surgery.
me: I recall Dr. Boobman telling me it was highly unlikely it would impact my ability to breast feed in the future although I told him I had no intention of having children.
md: WHelll, he told me I couldn't breast feed.
me: IS THAT BECAUSE YOU WERE FIFTY WHEN YOU HAD THE OPERATION??? I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE YOU HAD THAT CONVERSATION WITH HIM. HOW FRIGGING CREEPY!
Yeah, so, I ended up putting in a call to the Doc's office and he's on vacation so it took over 2 weeks to get an answer. Of course the answer is I should have no problems. Of course she made me doubt the fact that I knew that already. Of course I'm a fucking moron for letting her over the threshold of my home for even one 24 hour span. Hoo boy.
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