can you hear me now?
When last I spoke to my "mother" I quite clearly told her that I would only speak to her in a therapeutic environment. Dueling shrinks. Witnesses. Security. I was crystal clear.That was May 9th.
Since that time my baby sister graduated college. My father was murdered. My darling girl turned 4 a week after my darling husband turned 41. My life is moving too fast most days, and other days I just plain sleep through. But for my loved ones I push and push and push and hope to gain forward ground. I'm trying.
She called 2 days ago. No apology. Nothing reasonable even, although the unreasonable is always expected. She left a message saying she wished to see Rio and Bear. Call her back. This is her number.
Not a call from a therapeutic environment so, I did not return the call, as commanded.
Yesterday's message. "I'll be heading down your way on Friday and I would like to be allowed to see Rio. Call me."
She doesn't know my father was killed or she'd call and say something completely fucked up. I can't see her in a weakened state. I don't want to anyway. But does anyone want to guess who can't sleep?
Bear offered to call her. Tell her no. Tell her she's not welcomed. Tell her she's breaking the rules. Tell her she can not make me leave my house. My house.
She knits cashmere sweaters for her dog. She writes letter after letter; to the editor, the governor, old boyfriends. She has never given Rio a single gift. She has never sent one card. Not one 'Happy Birthday' card. Not one 'Happy Holidays' card. Not one. Ever.
She didn't keep us safe in her house and now she's planning to bring it here? I don't think so. I am on edge and waiting til Friday, Saturday, Sunday pass safely.
Watch the papers. This could go terribly wrong. Or maybe just right.
